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Meet the Hosts

Dr. Bruce Chalmer

Bruce is a psychologist specializing in couples therapy. He earned his masters in Statistics and Ph.D. in Psychology at the University of Vermont. He is the author of Reigniting the Spark: Why Stable Relationships Lose Intimacy, and How to Get It Back, and It’s Not About Communication! Why Everything You Know About Couples Therapy is Wrong.

His other notable interests include musical composition (especially on Jewish themes), performance, and choral directing.

Judy Alexander

Judy is an educator, and retired in 2021 after serving for 23 years as Education Director at Temple Sinai in South Burlington, Vermont.

Additionally, Judy is a playwright and an award-winning advertising copywriter.

Presently Judy continues to prepare children and adults for Bar/Bat Mitzvah, and is writing short fiction. She also is the voiceover actor “Judy the Voice.”  

Besides professional interests, Judy enjoys reading, watching old Hollywood movies, baking, biking, and playing Mah Jongg.

About the show

The seven words referred to in the title come from a formula Bruce devised many years ago. Here’s how Bruce explains it in his book, It’s Not About Communication! Why Everything You Know About Couples Therapy is Wrong:

“Early in my career a colleague in a consultation group asked me, ‘How do you do couples therapy, anyway?’ I’m sure he realized it was a facetious question, especially with the expectation that the answer will be equally brief, but I thought for a second and said, ‘I suppose when you boil it down, I’m basically telling people, “Be kind and don’t panic.”‘ Sometime later I adde­d a third clause, and the formula became ‘Be kind, don’t panic, and have faith.’  Those seven words have proven a useful guide, not only for me but for many of the couples I’ve worked with. What helps couples? Essentially, therapy is about offering the three principles of the formula.”

To learn more about the seven words, listen to our inaugural episode here.

A husband and wife duo, Dr. Bruce Chalmer and Judy Alexander bring their experience together for interesting conversations with each other and special guests covering relationship topics.

The “Couples Therapy in Seven Words” podcast started in 2020. Bruce’s book Reigniting the Spark had been released on February 29, 2020—just in time for a world-wide pandemic. Since he couldn’t do in-person book launch events, Bruce decided to do a virtual book launch, and invited Judy to co-host. (You can see the book-launch event here.)

Bruce and Judy had a blast doing the event together, and got lots of feedback about their sizzling on-air chemistry. So they decided to do a podcast!

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Would you like to be interviewed on the podcast?

If you would like to be a guest on the podcast, book a time at this link and tell us what you’d like us to interview you about. (You’ll have a chance to tell us that when you select a time for the interview.)

Maybe you have an interesting question or a difficult situation you’d like us to talk about. Or maybe you’ve written a book, or have your own podcast, or are just generally someone with interesting things to say about relationships. We’d love to hear from you!

When you sign up for a time, we’ll be in touch with details.

By agreeing to be interviewed, you’re agreeing that:

      • You’re allowing us to use our interview with you on the podcast–it’s all “on the record.” We will be editing the interview for length and clarity. You will receive no payment for participating, and the recorded material will be the property of Dr. Bruce Chalmer.
      • We’re not providing any kind of therapy or treatment to you. We’re not establishing any kind of provider-client or doctor-patient relationship. Our only purpose in talking with you is to make an interesting podcast, not to provide you with treatment. We hope you’ll enjoy it!
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